The quickest way from A to B is if you drive instead of me.

Yes, that should say “instead of I,” but you don’t care, so I stuck with the popular choice. I’m such a follower.

Hey, what’s your Twitter?

The meeting/interview/peefest ended, finally, and right before I left he said I could stop by main campus before 4pm (it was 3:30) and get all of the paperwork started. Great, so where’s main campus? Ah ok, just straight out of here and in a little bit it’s that one street on the left. Beautiful.

So, here was my route:


I decided to file the paperwork online. It was already 4:30.

Guess I’ll head home! Aand which way’s that now?

I actually managed to figure that one out with a lot less trouble. And in my defence, the street I was supposed to turn left on didn’t exist until you were actually on campus; it has a different name when you turn from the street I was told to take. So essentially I’m still awesome at navigation (nod your head whichever way you choose). Plus, I almost drew a flamingo on the map. So there’s that.

My next challenge was to find a place to live. I had about a month before classes started, so there was a bit of pressure to find something quickly. I felt like I was 40 and unmarried. Luckily that didn’t worry me, only my family, so I put it off for a bit.

When I finally got around to looking for places, they were few and far between, especially if I wanted to avoid weekly visits to the sperm bank. I booked a few appointments (not at the bank) and drove back up for a day to check them all out. Every place was the same; I would drive down a decent street and when I got to the shadiest waste of acreage, that was it. And they were outrageously priced.

So I booked a few appointments (at the bank) to relieve some stress. Then someone returned my email while I was leaving town and said I could stop by to check out their place. So I turned around to make one last visit.

I’ve been there eight months now and I move out tomorrow.  I’d stumbled into a goldmine, albeit a goldmine where no one washes the sifters. Still, those are small potatoes in the big picture (not judging their man-parts).

Well, it’s about time to go decide on a thesis topic, so stay tuned. E flat. Real bluesy.


You’re allllright.

Talk soon.